Gamertell

Title: Postal: The Movie
Price: $26.99 (DVD), $34.99 (Blu-Ray)
Release Date: August 26, 2008
Studio: Vivendi Entertainment
Rating: “Not Rated” (Blood, violence, mature humor, nudity, strong language and sexual themes).
Pros: Surprisingly decent cinematography and funny moments. Plenty of guest appearances and carnage. Ships with full version of Postal 2 videogame and includes Boll boxing matches as bonus feature.
Cons: Some really low points of humor. Not quite as shocking as promised or bloody as expected but definitely not for kids.
Overall Score: One thumb up and one thumb down; 75/100; C; * * 1/2 out of five.

It’s a sad truth that games based on movies generally suck. Movies based on games, unfortunately, usually aren’t much better.

So, if you embrace the inevitable crapitude and give one of the most offensive video games to a filmmaker infamous for horrible game-to-big-screen adaptations, you should get a pile of putrid stupidity in the form of an entirely dismissible movie, right?

Well, not exactly.

Click through for the full review…

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Check out the gallery: Postal: The Movie screen shots

Oh, the humanity! Uwe Boll’s trashtastic film, which famously played in an embarrassingly low number of theaters, has come out on DVD and Blu-ray. Kotaku reports that the film is packed with “features”, like an Uwe commentary, an Indiana Jones spoof starring Verne Troyer, and a copy of Postal 2 for PC.

Depending on your tolerance for lame filmmaking, dumb satire, and offensive humor, you’ll either be very excited or very disgusted at the prospect of owning this little piece of cinematic history. Either way, the DVD and Blu-ray versions are out today, with MSRP’s of $26.99 and $34.99, respectively. You can find it (if you dare…) at most major retailers.

Read [Kotaku] Also Read [Monsters and Critics]

• The trouble with Uwe Boll
• Gamertell Review: Postal: The Movie on DVD
• Postal fails to impress

More often than not when you hear about the films House of the Dead, Bloodrayne, Alone in the Dark or In the Name of the King, there is a background of insulting murmurs of complete and utter contempt. They, and other absolutely horrid game-based movies, are either produced, written or directed by Uwe Boll.

Even though the majority of people can - and most likely will - argue that he is the worst thing to happen to game-based films, it’s a wonder why people still go to see his movies.

The trouble with Uwe Boll is that he wants respect but he’s going about it the wrong way…

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In a move that should surprise no one, Uwe Boll’s latest game-adapted opus, Postal, has been met with some harsh reviews. According to the New York Times, the film is “Infantile, irreverent and boorish to the max” and features jokes that span the range from “tasteless” (9/11 gags) to “tired” (“jokes about Oprah’s diet and indecisive Starbucks customers”).

Aww, is anyone surprised? As the resident (self-appointed) Boll film expert, I can’t say there’s anything really remarkable to see here, just terrible filmmaking. I personally think his 2006 BloodRayne was his pinnacle (in that “so bad its good” way), and I can’t imagine that a film he made to be intentionally funny could ever succeed.

Read [NYTimes]

• Gamertell Review: Postal: The Movie on DVD
• The trouble with Uwe Boll
• Postal on DVD and Blu-ray today

Normally, we here at Cut/Scenes tolerate and/or ignore the antics of one Uwe Boll, director of terrible game movies (several of which have appeared in our lame game movie nights). We figure the man gets enough publicity for his various stunts (making terrible movies, boxing his fans), and he certainly doesn’t need our help.

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