Rachael Ray must be stopped before she makes a videogame
It’s time to revolt. Rachael Ray is starting to invade everything good and twist it into an unbearable bundle of annoyance.
The recent announcement that she’s going to star in her own animated/cartoon series has convinced me that she needs to be stopped before this trend to invade all media spreads too far and she stars in her own damn videogame.
Rachael used to be so fun and adorable, bopping around various cities, finding fabulous mid-priced eats and showing us how to make something edible in a half hour. Even her somewhat squeaky voice was bearable due to her perky outlook and seemingly genuine enjoyment of food.
Then the silly slang started slipping in ("evoo", “yum-o,” “fantabulous” and, the worst, “delish” ). Then the product tie-ins (cutlery and frickin’ Triscuits). The ultimate blow was when the Oprah effect kicked in and Rachael got her own magazine, Every Day with Rachael Ray. The TV behemoth got her grubby corporate hands on our little chef and turned her into an over exposed icon of annoyance. Even though she has various celebrities and guests, Rachael’s talk show is ultimately all about her (much like Oprah’s) and not that enjoyable (much like Oprah’s). Now I cannot even watch her other, older shows without feeling the negative effects of her over exposure.
Although Oprah has not yet stared in or produced a videogame (thank The Maker), I’m afraid Rachael’s cooking background will inspire some exec somewhere to slap her face on a shovelware version of Cooking Mama, extending the Oprah influence of evil into the videogame world. The sign of this inevitability is, of course, the announcement that Rachael will star in her own animated series. Produced by Harpo Productions (Oprah’s company), the yet-to-be-named series will feature Rachael as a young chef and is expected to air January 2009.
My fear is not unjustified. Check out any cartoon channel, then head to your favorite online game shop and you’ll see that almost all cartoons are eventually turned into a videogame: Ed, Edd and Eddy; Ben 10; Samurai Jack, The Simpsons, etc.
You may scoff, you may laugh, but my game-playin’ friend, it is only a matter of time before a Cooking All Friggin’ Day with Rachael Ray: The Game is a reality and - *shudder* - your mom buys it for you for Christmas.
She must be stopped.
PS: The only Rachael Ray themed game I will forgive is the Rachel Ray Drinking Game since that’s pretty much making fun of her celebrity and is the only way a legal-age person can get through one of her shows.
Read [SlashFood] Also Read [Pop Crunch] Play [Rachel Ray Drinking Game]
Editor’s Note: Gamertell does not condone the consumption of alcohol by minors. Also, we are not suggesting you do anything violent to a person, place or celebrity.
UPDATE: 04/04/2008 11:00 PM: Dammit. I just saw a Dunkin’ Donuts commercial with Rachael Ray. Please stop, Rachael. Please just stop.
UPDATE: 04/06/2008 4:14 PM: I just received an email for one of those crappy opinion sites that was using a free Rachael Ray chef package as the lure. Will the insanity ever end?!
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Be careful what food-oriented sites you visit as well… one wrong click and you suddenly have a subscription for her over-hyped magazine.
With demands for money, despite you never having heard of it before.
And despite gagging at the recipes contained within said unwanted magazine.
And to think, I used to have such a crush on her…
on April 5, 2008 at 02:35 PM - LINKYou forgot the most annoying slang - calling olive oil ‘double O’…
Nigella Lawson is sooo much cooler.
on April 5, 2008 at 02:42 PM - LINKGASP… and the stuff she cooked. I’ve tried her recipes. It was awful and you know its bad when the cat won’t touch it let alone disappears for a week after smelling it.
on April 5, 2008 at 05:40 PM - LINKI"d watch her cartoon !!!! Right On Rach -
You are the QUEEN OF THE WORLD !!!
Love ya,mean it !!
on April 5, 2008 at 05:51 PM - LINKActually, she needed to be stopped before someone thought it would be a good idea to give her her own South by Southwest showcase, but since someone fell down on the job there, we might as well get used to our Wii-motes doubling as egg whisks or something
on April 5, 2008 at 10:30 PM - LINKI couldn’t agree with you more! Why doesn’t she realize that enough is enough? We can’t even go grocery shopping peacefully anymore, without looking at her annoying face in olive oil bottles, Triscuit box, etc etc. Please somebody just stop the madness already!
on April 6, 2008 at 01:54 AM - LINKI hate her. For real. I can’t go anywhere or watch tv without seeing her annoying face. Plus, apparently, the fame has gone to her head, and now she’s a pain in the ass to work with, or so I’ve heard. I wish the bitch would go away.
on April 6, 2008 at 09:45 AM - LINK